Random Encounters

Ever since the “Ear Bud Incident,” I’ve been more conscious of other people, their expressions and moments that can be shared randomly.My momma didn’t raise a child that was incapable of learning from experience! Today the weather was ridiculous, first snow then rain.Shoveling that stuff was a back breaker, followed by my workout at the gym.I was feeling really heroic leaving the gym, when a bus drove by and slammed me with a tsunami of street water.If the ground wasn’t wet, I’d have sat down and cried.But maybe I could have just had a good laugh! From there it was to CVS to pick up a prescription.My sweaty and soggy self was on line when I noticed that we were standing next to the condom aisle.The woman ahead of me was starting to huff and puff because the service was slow, so I said, “Well, at least we can shop for condoms while we’re waiting.”She cracked up and we both had a good laugh. This was followed by the spring-loaded umbrella of the man behind me opening up on my derriere.…

Family of the Heart

Amazing humans we are!  We’ve figured out ways to trace our DNA history and get to know our genetic ancestors.  There are options now to send a cheek swab to the lab and figure out where our ancestors came from.  We get to write our own sequels to the famous Alvin Haley book “Roots.”
Don’t tell anyone (ahem), but the previous generation can be both blessing and challenge.  If we’re fortunate, those relationships are authentic and filled with gratitude.  The fact is that some of those relationships are challenging and not what we would choose if they weren’t blood relations.
No worries, because we can create a Family of the Heart.  Some members of our blood clan can occupy that precious circle, while others are “ceremonial family members,” worthy of respect and a type of love.  But those we consciously choose on our Path are often a better match to our spirit than those we were assigned through ancestry.
Family of the Heart consists of our brothers and sisters of destiny.  They are th…


The whole notion of “meditating” can be intimidating.  We have images of Eastern folks sitting in ashrams with chanting monks in the background.  They seem transfixed and unfamiliar to the Western eye.  The imagery seems exclusive and in our rushed lives, impossible to implement.  And why would we “waste the time” when we’re only going to be sitting there thinking of what productive thing we could be doing instead!?
Steven Covey, in his book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People,” offers the practice of sharpening the saw.  He states that we can hack away at a tree with a dull saw, thinking we’re working hard and accomplishing something, or we can take the time to sharpen the saw and operate efficiently and effortlessly.
Maybe we don’t have to create a daunting ceremony to accomplish this and simply can take a moment here and there to close our eyes and breathe.  Maybe we can stop the mad rush and feel our own presence.  I call that a “mini-meditation.” 
There are types of bre…

For Lovers Only

Of course you opened this blog because YOU are indeed a lover.You are a lover of sunrises and sunsets.You are a lover of opportunity.Are you a lover of people, but only when they fill your needs the moment? I say this because it’s hard to love what doesn’t feel good.In my experience, what feels good is wonderful, but it’s not always what we need.Sometimes what feels bad is a blessed opportunity in disguise. As we grow in awareness and look back on our lives, the hurts have accumulated and the suffering has been real.We have only two choices; bitterness or transformation. Option #2 isn’t the easy road.It’s much easier to blame life, people and be “oh-so-misunderstood”.But if you are really a lover, you will gradually learn that the transformational opportunities in hurtful experiences are deep and our focal length has to increase to see beyond the suffering. My Uncle Shah once said, “In my 80s I look back at life as I’m living it.”At the time I smiled politely, but I didn’t get it.Now…

The Ear Buds Travesty

I love that first cup of coffee in the morning!Yes, I can make coffee, but going to the coffee bar at QuickChek (don’t judge me) is part of my morning routine.I choose the “Columbian” coffee, medium sized cup.I use five packets of Stevia, light cream and in a gesture of self-indulgence, I add a little whipped cream to top it off.Ahhh! The other morning I was in the throes of my coffee ritual when a friendly woman sidled up next to me and started preparing her coffee.It went like this: Woman:“Good morning!” Me:“Good morning.” (Still preparing my coffee) Woman:“How is your day going so far!?” Me:“Great!Don’t you love that first cup of coffee!?” Woman:“What do you have planned for your day?” Me:“Oh, will do some paperwork and prepare for my class later.” Woman:“What are you doing after work?” Me:(Feeling awkward) “Uh, well I finish pretty late, so…”(I look up) I see that the woman has ear buds in and has been talking to someone else, not me.I’ve been having a conversation with someone w…